spicy meat pole

let's say you are a guy and you decide to cut up some jalapenos.

and then let's say, hypothetically, you decide to go take a piss.

all i'm going to say is be sure you wash your hands before you touch your pecker.

should you happen to cover your pecker in capsaicin, the chemical that makes peppers hot, you might want to coat your meat pole in sour cream to cool your flaming dick flesh. 

and then hope no one walks in on you.

again, this is all hypothetical. i swear it never happened to me.